Often referred to as the "Greeting," the Opening Words are spoken by your officiant to welcome your guests and set the tone for your wedding ceremony. We recommend that they be between two and five paragraphs in length.  Any less and the couple doesn't have a chance to catch their breath before participating in their vows. Any more and the guests will start to wonder when the couple gets to talk!

You should choose one numbered and one lettered option. Feel free to combine sentences from the various options to make your own unique wording.

The options offered below are primarily secular in nature, but can be easily modified with a word or phrase to make them more spiritual or religious.


1.        We are gathered here today, on this joyful occasion to celebrate the union of ________ and _______. We support them as they undertake this life of sacred commitment to one anohter.

2.        We are gathered here today in the presence of friends and loved ones, to celebrate one of life's greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and to add our best wishes and blessings to the words which shall unite ________ and__________ in marriage.

3.        ____________ and ____________, in presenting yourselves here today to be joined in marriage, you perform an act of faith. This faith can grow and develop and last forever, but only if you both decide to make it so for a lasting and growing love is not guaranteed by any ritual.

4.        We are gathered here today to witness the coming together of two people, ____________ and ____________, whose hearts and spirits are entwined as one. They now desire to profess before the entire world their commitment to walk the road of life together.

5.        We, who have gathered here today are now privileged to witness and to participate in a ceremony celebrating, the public acknowledgment of a love, which ____________ and ____________ have for each other, knowing that by our presence here with them, we are saying that they, together, are loved by many others. We have come to support them as they stand before, where now ____________ and ____________ say "Welcome to our Celebration!"

6.        Marriage is a supreme sharing of experience, and an adventure in the most intimate of human relationships. It is the joyous union of two people whose comradeship and mutual understanding have flowered in romance. Today ___________ and__________ proclaim their love and commitment to the world, and we gather here to rejoice, with and for them, in the new life they now undertake together.

7.        We are assembled here in the presence of these witnesses to celebrate the joining of this man and this woman in the unity of marriage. There are no obligations on earth more sweet or tender than those you are about to assume. There are no vows more solemn than those you are about to make. There is no human institution more sacred than that of the home you are about to form. True marriage is the most joyous of all earthly relationships.

8.        We have come here today to celebrate love. We see it in the faces of ________ and ________ who stand before us, and we experience it in our own hearts as well. It is a love which is spoken of in all religions, and is our true home, our true meeting place. It kindles our souls with hope. We are grateful to them for inviting us to witness and share in this precious moment. To this day they bring their love as a treasure to share with one another.

9.        Dear family and friends, on this joyous and happy day, our fondness for two special people has brought us here that we may witness their public declaration of love and commitment.

10.        We have come together today to witness the joining in marriage of  ________ and ________. As family and friends we wish celebrate their love with them and send them on their way with our love and best wishes for their future.

Additions to the Opening Words:

A.        Marriage is a commitment to life, the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other relationship can equal. It is a physical and an emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime.

        Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and cheerleader.
Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more strongly, and passes away more quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, new ways of expressing a love that is deeper than life.

 When two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique unto themselves which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people who love each other and takes a lifetime to fulfill.


B.        Marriage has certain qualities of a contract, in which two people take on the housekeeping tasks of living together, to enhance life's joy. However, marriage is more than a contract. It is a commitment to take that joy deep-deeper than happiness-into the discovery of who you most truly are. It is a commitment to a spiritual journey, to a life of becoming, in which joy can comprehend despair, running through rivers of pain into joy again.

And thus marriage is even deeper than commitment. It is a promise, a solemn promise that says, "I love you. I trust you. I will be here for you when you are hurting, and when I am hurting. I will not leave."

This is no promise to provide haven from pain, or from anger and sorrow. Life offers no such haven. Instead, marriage is intended to provide a sanctuary safe enough to risk loving, to risk living and sharing from the center of oneself. This is worth everything.

C.        A marriage is a promise between two people which takes a lifetime to fulfill; a promise to share your lives generously and enthusiastically each and every day; a promise to listen when the other needs to talk; a promise to comfort when the other needs assurance; and a promise to renew the appreciation and love you feel for each other.  

A good marriage must be created and maintained.  It is more than the excitement and romance of being deeply in love. By marrying, you are committing to an agreement-one that you must make new every day: "I agree to help you. I agree to look out for you. I agree to trust you and be worthy of your trust. I agree to put up with your bad moods and try to make you laugh. I agree to do the best I can, and if on occasion, my best falls short, I will continue to grow and get better."

And so each day becomes a small mosaic of plans and trials and laughter and ideas and promises shared and promises fulfilled, and to this we add the words: "Because I love you, I agree to do this. And because I love you, I will make this agreement anew everyday."

With love, shared pain is lessened. With love, shared joy is increased. Love makes you stronger, so that you can reach out and live in ways you dared not risk alone. Let your love give you the strength to stand apart, to make your own contributions to the world. Love each other's families as your own.  May you look upon each other's strengths with joy, accept each other's imperfections with understanding, and renew your love each and every day.

D.        Marriage requires "love," a word we often use with vague notions of romance and sentimentality. We may assume that love is some rare and mystical event, when in fact it is our natural state of being. When we love, we see things other people do not see. We see beneath the surface, to the qualities which make our beloved special and unique. To see with loving eyes, is to know inner beauty. And to be loved is to be seen, and known, as we are known to no other. One who loves us, gives us a unique gift: a piece of ourselves--a piece that only they can give us.

Love is the emergence of the larger self. It is the finding of one's life by losing it. Such is the privilege of husband and wife-to be each himself, herself and yet another; to face the world strong, with the courage of two.

To make this relationship work, however, takes more than love. It takes trust, to know in your hearts that you want only the best for each other. It takes dedication, to stay open to one another, to learn and grow, even when it is difficult to do so. And it takes faith, to go forward together without knowing what the future holds for you both. While love is our natural state of being, these other qualities are not as easy to come by. They are not a destination, but a journey.

E.        When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a disservice to pretend it is possible. Yet that is what most of us demand. We have such little faith in the ebb and flow of life and of love and of relationships.

We leap forward at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, for we are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanence, on duration, on continuity. But the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity and in freedom, as dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the same pattern.

I speak now to ____________ and ____________ of love, in which, the trust and freedom of the other person becomes as significant as the trust and freedom of one's self. I speak to them of generosity, which gathers the beauty of earth for riches and the kindness which turns away the wrath of foolish men and women. I speak of all our hopes for their continued growth through patience, one for the other.

F.        ___________ and ___________, if you would have the foundation of your marriage be the devotion you have for one another, not just at this moment, but for all the days to come, then treasure the hopes and dreams that you bring here today. Establish that your love will never be blotted out by the common nor obscured by the ordinary in life. Faults will surface where now you find comfort, and admiration can be shattered by the routine of daily life.

Commitment, love, and joy can grow only when you nourish them together. Stand fast in that hope with confidence, having faith in your shared destiny just as strongly as you have faith in yourselves and in one another today. Only with this spirit can you forge a union that will strengthen and endure all the days of your lives.

G.        The honor of performing a marriage ceremony does not belong to the wedding officiant. My role here is not to marry ______ and ________, for they are marrying themselves; I am simply here to facilitate their celebration. In reality, their marriage celebration extends to everyone present at this wedding because marriage cannot be separated from the community that recognizes it.

And this is why we are here-not so much to perform a marriage ceremony as to recognize one. A commitment made before a community is different from words spoken alone, no matter now meaningful those other, more private words may be. A commitment made before a community is a courageous proclamation whereby two people state publically, "This is what I avow; this is what I pledge to do. This other person is now irrevocably intertwined with me and these honored guests are witnesses to my promise to live with this person in a life of exclusive commitment."

This is more complicated and difficult than it first appears. "True minds" are of course faithful to one another, but the phrase means more than that. "True minds" are minds in accord with each other and, at the same time, minds that are open to each other. It is this openness that takes the most courage because, unless we have somehow remained quite innocent, we know ourselves too well to want others to know us. Yet, this is precisely the commitment people who get married make, a commitment we do not ask of each other in any other context. It requires a constant balancing act, weighing kindness against honesty, honesty against kindness, and finally, finding a kind way to speak honestly and an honest way to be kind. This is never perfect, but it is what the act of marriage entails.

For an outdoor wedding in the spring:

H.        ______________ and _______________, this marriage signifies the birth of a new spirit, a spirit which is a part of each of us, yet not of any one of us alone. This "birth of spirit" reminds us of spring, the season when all life is reborn and looms again. It is appropriate, therefore, that your wedding be in the spring, and that it be under the open sky, where we are close to the earth and to the unity of life, the totality of living things of which we are part.

For an outdoor wedding in summer

I.        To ___________ and ___________, this marriage signifies the birth of a new spirit, a spirit which is a part of each of us, yet not of any one of us alone. As we stand here so close to the glory of nature we are inspired to thoughts of peace, beauty, strength and permanence. All is as it should be. This glorious summer day and the gathering of us all here reminds us that we are better together than we are alone and that life is full of hope. Love's possibilities are as high and wide as the summer sky! It is appropriate, therefore, that this wedding of _____________ and ____________ be under the open sky, where we are close to the earth and to the unity of life, the totality of living things of which we are a part.

For an outdoor wedding in the fall:

J.        To ____________ and ______________, this marriage signifies the birth of a new spirit, a spirit which is a part of each of us, yet not of any one of us alone. As we enter another beautiful autumn, our thoughts naturally turn toward a spirit of home and family.  All is as it should be. Our hot summer days turn into crisp autumn evenings and we are reminded that we are better together than we are alone and that life is full of hope. Love's possibilities are as high and wide as the autumn sky! It is appropriate, therefore, that this wedding of __________ and _________ be under the open sky, where we are close to the earth and to the unity of life, the totality of living things of which we are part.

For a wedding in the winter

K.        To ____________ and ______________, this marriage signifies the birth of a new spirit, a spirit which is a part of each of us, yet not of any one of us alone. As we gather in the midst of a glorious snowy (if appropriate) winter in these beautiful surroundings to celebrate with ______ and ______, our hearts and our spirits are warmed and rejuvenated by the light of their love. Today is the newest chapter in their love story and they have invited all of us to share and witness as they proclaim their love and commitment on this snowy (cold) winter evening (day).