How to Conduct a Wedding Rehearsal
Managing a wedding rehearsal may seem a daunting task, especially if you don't think you are the "manager" type. However, there are some simple steps you can do to make it a breeze. First of all, it is assumed that you have a written script of your ceremony in hand. So, armed with your trusty wedding script, follow the steps below and you'll have a practice session that runs smoothly (and get everyone to the rehearsal dinner in less than 45 minutes)!
If the ceremony is at the same location as the reception, then the venue might provide you with a coordinator to run your rehearsal at no additional charge. These folks are invaluable--they know their venue and how things flow smoothly. Rely on them;they might even run the rehearsal for you if you give them the script.
1. Start in the middle. Line up the entire wedding party exactly where they will stand during the ceremony. As the audience faces the "altar", men should be on the right, women on the left. Next to the groom should be his best man and next to the bride will be her maid of honor. Bridesmaids will stand to the left of the maid of honor with groomsmen to the right of the best man. Wedding party members should angle their bodies slightly so that they are facing toward the bride and groom. Those on the outside should step forward, if possible, so that the wedding party forms a "V" with the bride and groom in the middle. Have someone who is not in the wedding view the lineup from the back of the room to see if everyone is centered and evenly spaced. If you want to be really precise and the venue allows it, you can place tape on the floor to mark the place.
2. Go through the ceremony headings only. It's not necessary to read over the entire ceremony--save that excitement for the big day. Things to watch for: determine who will have the rings and how they will be presented to the officiant, establish the parts in the ceremony when the bride and groom face the officiant, face each other, or turn toward guests, if there are ceremony "props" such as roses you will present to parents, make sure you know where they will be during the ceremony.
If the bride and groom are really nervous about speaking in public, they may want to practice their vows at the rehearsal. If there are readers or singers, they might want to practice their piece as well.
3. Practice the recessional After the kiss, the bride will get her bouquet from the maid of honor and bride and groom will face their guests. Often at this time, the officiant will introduce the newlyweds as Mr. & Mrs. for the first time, then the recessional music strikes up and off they go! Best man and maid of honor will wait until the bride and groom are at the back of the room (or past the last row of chairs)and then the best man will extend his right arm to the maid of honor and they will walk out together.
Subsequent couples should stay put until it is their turn to leave (in other words, don't do the "inching into the center" shuffle--have them wait.) Select an agreed-upon distance whereby each couple will exit (for example: when the couple in front gets to the fifth row of chairs, then the next couple goes, etc.). In this manner, each couple will leave in uniform fashion, without bunching up. After the last couple exits, the parents and any people sitting in the front row should immediately follow.
4. Practice the processional last. Now that everyone knows where to stand when they are up in the front, the processional should be a piece of cake. By now, you will have determined who will be in the processional and in what order, so simply line people up accordingly. (Hopefully, it's on your script!). Then, start walking. As you did for the recessional, pick a spot at which each couple or person will begin walking (e.g. when the first bridesmaid gets to the front row, the second should begin walking, and when the second gal gets to that same spot, the third gal will go, etc.). That way no one bunches up like Keystone Cops!
The bride and her escort (if there is one) should not enter until the entire wedding party is at the front. Generally, the bride will have a separate piece of music than the rest of the wedding party, so that's a good clue as to when to start walking. Also, the officiant will have everyone stand for the bride, so that's when it's time to make the grand entrance.
5. The hand off. This is the trickiest part and if you don't practice it, it will look awkward, so pay attention. As the bride comes down the aisle, she will be on her father's left arm. When it's time for Dad to be seated, bride should kiss him good-bye. Dad will then walk behind the bride to his seat. (Don't step on that train, Dad!). Bride should hand her flowers to her maid of honor with her left hand. Groom should extend his left hand to the bride, who will take it with her right hand. He will then "draw her in" to face the officiant. Try it-it's very fluid once you practice it. At this time, the maid of honor can hand both sets of flowers to the next bridesmaid in line and fix the bride's train if needed.
In the case where both parents escort the bride, decide at the rehearsal which parent the bride will kiss first (otherwise the bride looks like a ping-pong ball as she hovers indecisively). Mom should turn around and walk to her seat (she'll be seated in the front row on the bride's side) and Dad will proceed to his seat as outlined above.
6. The Summary. Walk through the recessional and processional one more time and you're done. And don't get stressed if the groomsmen are clowning around and only half paying attention or the maid of honor is pouting because she can't be escorted by her boyfriend. Everyone always seems to come through on the big day!